Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
the girls im babysitting are trying to see how much jello they can swallow without chewing...their future boyfriends are lucky
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
Penises. Everywhere.
You're. Welcome.
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
Do you remember telling our cab driver you were going to fuck a penguin?
Next year for Halloween you can be the sword swallower, with a penis shaped sword.
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
I need water and some morals
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
