Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
you're a mystery wrapped in an enigma. wrapped inside a burrito.
my dad just told me he found me on the kitchen floor saturday morning with a microwave dinner on top of me, fork still in hand. priceless
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
Everything is fine, it's not hung over in here at all\n\n*Narrator* *but in fact everything was not fine*
Now I have the opportunity to have Chris Pratt or Channing Tatum?!? What a time to be alive.
Randomize
