Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
I just sent her mug shot out in a mass text because I hate her and her cocaine eyes are hilarious.
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
Last night I passed a kidney stone as I came inside her. Worst. Experience. Ever.
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
We took her out for fresh air and next thing we knew, she was stumbling around the backyard picking dead leaves up off the ground and putting them in her shirt to "save them".
We are in Florida for 3 days. The people in charge of shit brought: a waffle maker, a cheese grater and a SEWING MACHINE
AND NO VODKA
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
Randomize
