We just got home. I got some malt liqour and a lottery ticket so I'm really doing a lot with my life right now
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
I think being a buddhist has made me a better drunk
I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
Remember earlier when I was excited about finding that birth control pill in my purse? Definitely acid.
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
He started yelling terms of endearment at a cheese sandwich. Then he tried to hump it.
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
we went to go have morning sex and I said “I was gonna put my mouth on it but you need to shower”#ruinedthemoment
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
Randomize