i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
broke, out of weed, out of gas, out of food, and my gf just left me.
you're writing country songs now?
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
I woke up this morning and saw that I had transferred $0.75 from my savings account to my checking account.
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
Attn every girl I've slept with in the past 26 years of my life. One of you cunts gave me herpes. This is the 4th of 5 group MMS. That's right. It's in the 50s. There are two girls I don't have #s for. One was on a cruise and the other was a prostitute in Amsterdam. So which of you has herpes?
Sometimes I love sober logical me. She makes rare appearances but when she does she shines.
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
I distinctly remember telling him "I'll suck your dick while you eat pizza"
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
The stripper was super into me until she pulled out my tits then I realized.... This bitch is just using my ass to get MORE TIPS
I woke up and there was a tiny sombrero on my penis. Care to explain?
Randomize
