I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
I mean this holiday was built on cheap beer, shitty whisky, and processed meat... and I fully plan to honor that
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
It's ok, I may have just peed outside your car and used your whataburger napkins. Hope you weren't saving them for a special occasion.
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
Just bailed on her the best way possible. Got tickets to the game. Only issue is.... if we lose, we not only lost, but I skipped sex to watch us lose
I just dumped the bloody coke bill into the tip jar while getting my hangover coffee. I'm literally going to hell.
I'm totally going to bang the cable guy tonight. I'm so pumped
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
Randomize
