:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
Def drinking wine from a 4 liter jug at 11 am. If i call you in 20 years talking about 12 steps, please trace is back to this moment.
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
HEAR YE, HEAR YE! BY ROYAL DECREE, I WILL BE KNOCKING ON YOUR DOOR AT 2PM UNLESS YOU GET THE FUCK UP. IT'S 1:50. CIGARETTE TIME, BITCH. I LOVE YOU.
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
Wingman of the year award. I made out with her gay roommate in order for you to get laid. Better have been good.
The gay roommate was probably better than her. Consider yourself lucky.
Why is there a video on my phone of us trying to snort a line of Reeces Pieces with you chanting "This is how fat girls party"?
I think I'm drunk at the airport. Oh the possibilities
Any residual attraction has just been ruthlessly murdered by that mustache.
This has to be the weirdest conversation I've ever had sober and in the middle of the day before.
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
I kept screaming at his rabbit: "IT'S OKAY, YOU CAN HAVE SOME TRIX. FUCK THOSE SELFISH BITCHES."
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
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