Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
hey, we don't wanna leave the house because we're watching fireworks on tv. this is america.
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
organizing the empties. That sober.
TAKE ALL THE MAERHMALLOWS AND PUT THEM ALL IN THE MAGICAL NIGHTSTAND
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
I'm actually not sure I need to run today, between the crazy monkey sex and breaking into my own house.
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
Randomize
