I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
He sent me a Microsoft outlook meeting request to blow him in the storage room at work. I had to accept.
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
He told me I had smoking hot areolas then he wins an executive of the year award. How does that even happen?
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
The cat's telling me to stop taking acid, and to start doing the lords work. I'm almost 99% sure he's talking about the dark lord.
THIS CAT'S GOING TO TURN INTO A SNAKE AND KILL ME! GET OVER HERE NOW! BRING YOUR WAND.
I'm at this party and a blind kid just walked in and asked "where is the fucking pong table"
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
Randomize
