I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
on the way home the dog started throwing up her bone in the car..so naturally i started to puke too
This is the 4 year anniversary of the last time I shit my pants. Let's get drunk...
I got laid because I told her I play guitar. I haven't played in 7 years and only know a G chord. I love this place.
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
When you went through airport security you asked if the could check if a baby was in there. That drunk.
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
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