She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
This just in: I met a girl who does the phone sex phone lines, and shes' 5'4" 320. I'll never get a hardon again through a phone.
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
How's work?
Spinning.
Just bought a McDouble with a tightly rolled dollar. The lady just gave me a sad face...
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
Why are your underwear on my dining room table?
That tingly feeling you're experiencing in your lady parts is my mustache. All the ladies of America are waking up feeling the same thing. You're welcome.
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
Shut up. I hate you. We're doing shots tomorrow. Fuck the consequences.
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
At some point you said you just wanted to get laid, so we had a moment of silence for your dead sex life...
Dude on the shuttle bus eating a Butterfinger and watch porn on his phone and doesn’t give a fuck who knows
We need to get on his level
Randomize