ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
ugh.. my birth control just came out of my nose. wtf?
john hughes is dead. crushing any and all dreams of me ever being in an 80's john hughes film. bummer.
He bought me flowers. The card with it said: Sorry I cant get you off. I will try harder.
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
We ended up debating which Food Network host would do best in porn.
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
She won't let me meet her hot new boy toy just because she thinks it'll lead to us having a threesome. It's not fair. I thought we were friends...
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