Having kids is risky. They might end up weird.
Dude feel your hair right now it feels so weird like pasta
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
I woke up to three texts telling me to "go fuck myself," a panicked voicemail from my mom, and a girl thanking me... I'm not sure which I should take care of first
Her directions to the house party: "the north star will guide you, turn left. I'm wearing the potato hat"
I've got to stop making out with the guys and sharing drinks with you. I'm the reason we all get sick at the same time. Sorry.
Don't mean to be rude. But did you, by any chance, cut down a tree from my neighbors backyard last night? And did you also drag it to my yard and burn it?
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
Hopefully my orange shoes will distract people's attention from my crippling awkwardness
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
Randomize
