90% of the problems in your life are directly related to your vagina
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
i need a new camera phone. my pictures from last night are as blurry as my memories. and neither tell me why i woke up in an airplane hangar.
Just woke up on a dolphin floaty wearing only a party hat. There's blood on the side of the pool and glass in the sauna. Worst fucking hangover. But some guy said he is making crepes so its ok
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
I wish my head, heart, dick, and nose could just agree on something for once
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
Well, I can't remember Thursday and my left ass cheek hurts like hell, I'm guessing Mike's bachelor party was a success.
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
Randomize
