when your friendship is based on dead babies and vodka there is a delicate balance. lesson learned. for what its worth, you are still my number one.
Just dominated the men's bathroom at work. Sounded like the intro of a death metal song.
I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
Your children are clinging to me like my teets are full of bountiful milkiness. They're driving me nuts. I felt my uterus shrivel up.
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
My mom added me on Snapchat which means I am officially done with Snapchat.
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
Randomize