when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
Why would I want to inherit a sex machine used by my grandma?
it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
My mom just admitted you were a good looking kid & if you weren't my friend & 30 years older she would do you. I'm going to commit suicide.
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
okay. well, yeah. i'm a mess and a half. this shit is not what dumbledore died for.
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
Remind me to never do anything where hiding something in my butt is the best course of action
Randomize
