We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
I woke up and someone had put toast at my feet. I was SO. HAPPY.
the paramedic just looked at me like "you again?"
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
You sprayed lysol all over me. You said that my soberness was infecting your night.
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF NINTENDO FILLED GLORIOUS ENCHANTING FANTASY LAND ARE YOU IN?! DUDE DID YOU MOVE TO THE 90S?!?!?!
At least you didn’t announce to an entire bar you’ve eaten pussy, and then knocked your beer over.
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
Randomize