Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
i should start naming my morning wood
great idea but wrong number
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
When I tried to give you a hickey, you karate chopped me in the neck.
I'm drinking and making muffins and I believe this is why God put us on earth.
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
Randomize
