Well he's not a stripper, so we're already doing better than my last date.
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
Like who needs a job and family when you can get drunk for free with strippers?
Before he gave me the breathelizer, he told me to "blow like you're blowing your boyfriend". I like him. My tax dollars are well spent
Hey! How are you feeling? Still preferring soup over sex?
Don't do it. It's 9 am on a Monday morning and I'm hungover. I can't deal with tears right now.
You kept calling yourself a spider monkey... Then ran to the bathroom to "prepare for the main event"
Randomize
