I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
Its a sad day when your bush has a better set of hair than you do
Balcony sex scratched the shit out of my phone. Whups.
Apparently I joined a band last night. Definitely my favorite blackout.
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
I just need a text that says "put that food down bitch" and then maybe I'll lose water weight through tears
I don't know if your celebrity crush has ever asked you for nudes, but it's fucking awesome
If you kill yourself you won't get to feel that feeling when you have a good shit in the morning. Arent you gonna miss that?
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
Wait... so you had sex and then your ear drum ruptured? I'm not sure if I want to ask if the two are related...
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
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