my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
Listen, it's not like I meant to bust the window out. It just sort of happened. And I'm also sorry for stealing your dads bandanas.
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
I woke up and found a doughnut on our front porch. It's not sketchy though. More like a gift from the gods.
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
Moral of the story: always keep condoms in your bra
You peed in my kitchen, while crying and insisting my floor was a toilet.
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
Randomize
