is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
don't ever try to run hungover. just puked mid-run in front of an old couple that were going for a walk. they were horrified.
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
Let the record show that the first hour of my twenty-first was spent shooting tequila ans discussing the emotional integrity of werewolves.
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
When I say "is it a bad idea to do Mollie before an 8hr shift tomorrow?" I dont want to hear the truth I want to hear you encouraging my bad decisions
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
I feel like it should at least be like a "hey look I'm actually fine that I drunkenly gave you my virginity!" friend request.
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
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