btw ... thanks for not giving me up as the craigslist killer
i owe you one
thanks for snagging those panties for me
I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
guys are only as good as the porn they watch
He just went up to bed, still drunk from last night, carrying a pear, a pipe, and an unopened bottle of wine. I think he'll be fine.
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
the amount of times i have wished for a boxed wine emoticon is almost alarming. almosttt
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
Randomize
