well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
Awesome morning. I just met my boyfriend's wife, should I have shaken her hand or was the hug a tad over the top?
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
I woke up this morning covered in blood and peanut butter. I am now safe from vampires with nut allergies.
We just had a 30 min argument on the actual birth date of Jesus, it ended in my brother and ain't cursing each other and an 8 yr old answering it by using Siri.
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
Come to office depot with me I need help picking out a daily planner that will help me keep all of my casual sex dates organized.
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
When the bouncer doesn't let you in... Don't ask him where he works so you could file a complaint with the better business bureau... It only proves him right.
It's 5 PM...and you're 35. Congrats on being an amazing human being.
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize
