You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
She was running around the bar, demanding everyone call her Jesus or else she would attack them like a llama. ack.
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
I already wrote the apology to my liver. He knows whats up
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
As he was under the stripper backwards, he yelled "we should totally be facebook friends"
Why did the fire extinguisher taste lemony?
So I'm sitting here baked on a bridge thinking about how plants think, I miss you so much
Dude, you vomitted into a trashcan wearing your bear hands and high heels. Your drug dealer even said that was rough.
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
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