hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
I caught a rooster roaming Edison Park then released it in the bar. They made me try to catch it again and somebody played the chicken dance while I chased it
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
Hey, you remember years ago when you told me you would give me a kidney?
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
and everyone will high five me and girls will approach me offering blowjobs
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
I woke up with a captain's hat on my desk.
This chick walked up to me in the bar and started making out with me, then grabbed my drink while I wasn't looking and walked off.
I don't know who he was but he was covered up with a shower curtain and ate a whole bottle of tums
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