i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
We started making out, then he decided to get naked, put on a condom, and proceed to dry hump my leg, sweat pants and all, until he blew his load. I thought this was college. I immediatly left claiming I can't sleep in other people's rooms. He didn't even bother taking off my hoodie.
You need to come get me. I'm pretty sure that gravity's going to crush my brain
Reason #1 for no sex outdoors: Mosquito bites. Awkward, awkward mosquito bites.
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
Fucking plugged the shower with taquitos I just threw up.
Recently successful and happy relationships are at an all time high now that you are no longer fucking so many peoples girlfriends. You alone have changed the mating patterns in the lower half of our county.
You need to stop relating my life to your schoolwork. But tell my girlfriend that she'd be proud.
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
I just love that it's Veterans Day because I know in my heart that I have serviced some of their brethren in the dirtiest, hottest, most shameful ways possible.
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
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