So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
I think my hot accountant is wearing banana republic. I miss the days when that ='ed gay. Signals are so confusing now.
we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
I spent three hours in the ER last night to figure out that my friend just had to take a shit
I lose my morals, my dignity, and my selfie stick :(
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
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