Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
Just saw 3 10-year olds in business suits drinking iced coffees at the cafe. I'm officially a failure if these kids have jobs and I don't.
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
he got up in front of the whole lecture hall and yelled that Charlie Brown's Christmas tree was his favorite book in the history of the universe. then he stumbled out the fire exit setting the alarm off. I could've jumped him right then and there.
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
We both work at 8am and I have to shower but my roommate is passed out on our bathroom floor with the door locked. Merry Christmas.
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
I am never drinking with the goths again.
Randomize
