In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
I walked into my house this morning to find an 18 pack on the counter. I think that's gods way of ringing the bell for round two.
I like to think that tonight was Jesus punishing James Cameron for his role in popularizing "My Heart Will Go On."
Just heard my neighbor say "I'm just gonna lay down in a coma until someone comes into my room and hands me a beer." He's got his priorities straight
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
Discovered a freckle on my clitoris. What have you done today?
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
I successfully convinced a drunk NDSU student that their school does not have a football team and another that they weren't in Fargo. I'm a dangerous sober shark in a sea of drunks.
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
He set the tone in the back of his car by blasting Marvin Gaye's sexual healing before railing me
Omg I just looked in my purse from last night.. 10 bags of gummy bears.
Randomize
