I heard we made out
I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
don't wear any deodorant. we have to do everything we can to sabotage this wedding
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
Doing bumps while the kids play upstairs. #bestnannyever
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
I love this text stream: discussing the development of a business model centered around cooking acid to bankroll a yacht trip in Croatia
I'm just sitting here drunk and eating peas because my life sucks
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
Randomize