jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
i would totally switch to progressive if they'd let me bang that girl in the commercial.
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
I tapped out to boredom. She bought me a full meal at Subway. Two tap beers and a pretty weak long island iced tea. I'm five dollars cheaper to fuck than she is.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
While running home from the bar in high heels I multi- tasked and sexted with Brent. Jesus.
Winning the lottery was the best thing that ever happened to my penis.
Greatest pickup line ever: "We are out celebrating winning the lottery."
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
I'd just like to take a moment now to apologize sincerely for getting drunk and making an as of myself at your Christmas party next week. I'm especially sorry for sleeping with your baby sister.
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
Randomize
