Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
The dingo escaped by eating a hole through my screen door. It's loose in the city somewhere.
In order of importance: Where am I? Where's my car? Where are my clothes? Who is this chick in the room?
Anne's couch, the bar, your car, Anne.
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
His dick is hereby named Charles Dickens. Will's is less cerebral. I'd like to call it Pinnacle like the vodka we drank when we hooked up, but I feel like that's a compliment it doesn't deserve.
Statistics show that guys with slightly higher IQ scores and overly-trimmed eyebrows have micro penises. It's science.
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
Randomize
