Dibs on passing out in front of the toilet.
why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
On a separate note, I just found out some condoms aren't vegan. Problem.
Hahahaha I can't wait for you to ask "wait. are there any animal by products in that?"
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
Randomize
