never play flip cup with pint glasses
Just saw the true definition of the muffin top and camel toe all on one person at the DC zoo... Tried to take a pic but she got away..
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
THERE IS WEED IN MY OVEN. HOW AM I EVER SUPPOSED TO MAKE CHICKEN PARMESAN WITH WEED IN MY OVEN.
Ultimate cock block. About to have sex and your mom calls you so you can go help your grandmother figure out how to vote for the voice on her iPad
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
I showered three hours ago and yet feel the need for another one already. This is my day.
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