dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
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