You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
I just dropped off shoes at Mike's hotel. The chick he hooked up with last night stole his phone and shoes.
Houston, we have a squirter
Hey wes just called me saying he was asleep outside by the pond at my apt complex
I woke up using a pile of socks as a pillow. I think theyre clean so thats a plus.
I hope your fat roommate breaks the bunkbed and crushes you in your sleep
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
got a blowjob in the bar bathroom, got arrested for public intoxication, and found a big bag of weed on the ground on my walk home from the station. my friday night could have been a movie
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
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