I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
I'm currently bartering with this guy so I can fuck his bi girlfriend. We're at 5 pizzas and he gets to watch us make-out.
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
She yanked on my limp dick and I yelped, to which she slurred something about starting it like a lawn mower
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
Kinda awkward to hear your aunt complain about loose women when you're in town to be a stunt dick for a swingers convention. Just sayin.
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
Plus you need some new dick in your life, the environment is fucked enough you don’t have to recycle anymore 😂💀
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