You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
She wouldn't go home with me cause I forgot her name. I didn't realize it would matter after she danced with her vagina on my face
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
i should teach a seminar on how to fall off the wagon
he made me feel like a shish kabob. his dick was the skewer.
and you said he wasn't worth calling.
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
It's 4:30 AM and I just walked through a line of 10 deer without them freaking out. I am the campus deer king.
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
Just saw my ex AGAIN. The constellation of gays must be at some sort of weird point with Mercury.
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
Randomize