i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
New plan, instead of sleeping with her, I'm just going to use her to sleep with the entire sorority.
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
Get the fuck buddy a birthday present or not? He def deserves one, but how do I explain the debit card charge to my husband?
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
i'm sorry i gave your brother a handjob while you were on the blanket next to us, but to be fair your back was turned.
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
Stop inviting me to your birth control calender reminders...my job is to test its effectiveness, not know its schedule
Lmao sorry
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
Where the fuck are you? I just got punched in the nose by a tourist
I threw up in my brother's Easter basket
Randomize
