She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
How do you get mayonnaise out of... well jesus it's everywhere, let's start with carpets
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
Went to 3 separate liquor stores today and I just made a huge tray of jello shots. This will be the Thanksgiving that puts all the others to shame.
To do list: put blue gatorade in a windex spray bottle. spray it into my mouth in public so people think i'm drinking windex.
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
I'm not drunk because I think my blood just is alcohol from last night so being drunk is sober. If that makes sense
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?
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