My life has hit rock bottom, I'm watching a movie on lifetime about retarded people falling in love. And I'm jealous of their relationship.
I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
Just stuffed an entire cupcake in my mouth after finishing third glass of wine. Valentines day is pretty much going how i expected it.
He set an alarm on my phone to an infant screaming and puking to make sure i take my pill. its working.
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
That's the last time I send a mass text invitation to smoke a blunt
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
my new years resolution to eat more toast and mastrubate more often is going well so far.
The man at the checkout said "Somebody's not fucking around".
It's gonna be a good night
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
its liver damage thursday
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
Randomize