Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
I cut holes in my blanket and put my arms through it. It's the sleeveless "Bro Edition" Snuggie.
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
Just promise me you won't ring in the new decade by clutching onto a toilet
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
You know, it's scary to think that someday I might buy a pregnancy test with pride, not at 2am...
You know just sitting here carrying on a conversation with a 5 yr old about why there is puke at the landing of the staircase
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away".
Thanks to that wedding, I got to use the term "finger bang" more than I have since high school.
I just saw a girl drinking wine and walking her dog in footie pajamas and a mad hatter hat. First day of the new year and I think I'm in love.
I feel like you should put up a missed connections ad for this..
BUT I'M ALSO ONLY IN IT FOR SEX AND HE CAN'T EVEN GET THAT PART RIGHT.LIKE LITERALLY ALL HE HAS TO DO IS DICK ME DOWN AND BE A DECENT HUMAN BEING IS THAT SO HARD TO ASK?!
I always felt my time would come in the form of a tidal wave of whisky
I woke up in the bathtub with money shoved down my pants. I must've done something right.
Randomize
