do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
You told the cashier at McDonald's not to smell the ones cause you had just got back from the strip club. Good deed.
we gave you a glass of water and you just started yelling: TWO STRAWS, PATS AN ENGINEER HE'LL FIGURE IT OUT
Well yeah connect the two together, then you can lay down and drink.
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
You ever have a fart follow you around?
Randomize
