I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
bring money and cleavage
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
it was like having sex with a tree stump
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
I just tipped the cab driver with pistachio nuts. And he loved it.
I tore the muscle in my left calf at the gym and still spent all evening in heels. UNSTOPPABLE!
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
I've decided it's okay if I take a pregnancy test every month. Then I can be like, "Good job, self, way to not procreate this month!"
Randomize
