mom just said that her bf is good in bed. fml.
i am watching a movie about a vagina with teeth and then you sent that to me while im eating sushi.
Even my vagina gasped.
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
Nurse helped me count all my sexual partners and still gave me her phone number. She shall be #73.
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
He's not replying to my booty call. Like wtf. You have ONE PURPOSE IN LIFE.
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
A unicorn in pinstripe pants just got on the J at Dolores stop. It can only be a good night
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
Randomize
