so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
Dude I was taking a shower and I kept looking down at the drain expecting Mario to come up, yell "It's a me, Mario!", tickle my balls, and go back down the drain.
So some sort of safe sex group just flash mobbed the bar by putting condoms over people's beers.
They left screaming as a hale of lubbed up condoms rained into their hair.
So then you challenged the bartender to an arm wrestling contest for a free bottle of vodka
Sweet. Did I win?
Youre hungover arent you?
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
And my parents said I crawled through the house
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
Randomize
