i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
I woke up covered in my own vomit with a pocket full of napkins. I guess I knew I would need them, but was not coherent enough to use them before passing out.
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
i decided this morning while eating my breakfast of red bull and cold pizza that i should take a vow of celibacy
Went to night shots with Kayla... she punched this guy and I got his friends number. Not sure if she's the best or worst wingman ever.
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
I just ate your leftovers whilst watching Garfield and Friends. Thank you across the board.
Sorry I wasn't opportunistic about sucking your dick in an Uber last night
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
Today's hangover is brought to us by Sailor Jerry's and your dedication to my alcoholism.
I just wrote a self loathing message to self, wrapped my credit card in it, put it in an envelope, sealed it with another hate messame, and put it in my lock box. So. That's where I'm at.
Randomize
