Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
I had to puke in a pizza box on the drive home. People saw.
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
Seriously why is the deadbolt locked. This is the second time I'm having to sleep on the porch using my boots as my pillow. I can't wait till the next time your drunk.
Shhh, I'm sleeping. Just let it happen Jess.
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.
The first crop top of the year and you're rocking it in the ER. #ratchet
What is my life?
Nothing says I'm committed to you for all eternity like letting him wear crocs to the wedding
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
It's really life affirming to be at a wedding thinking wow I took your husbands virginity
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
Randomize
