If I die today, promise to let the world know I partied.... oh god did I party
This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
He asked me if I "almost moaned"
i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
There's a guy at this party taking all the unfinised beers and pouring them into a pitcher so he can drink them tomorrow.
I don't remember her name, all I remember is trying to suck the wedding ring off her finger.
So instead of getting the if-you-hurt-my-little-girl-youre-dead talk, i got the alcohol-is-our-friend talk, i like her dad already
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
I don't know what to be prouder of: the fact that last night i was able to successfully find my way home from evanston with 3-d glasses on, or that i was able to make my way around my house in the dark with my pants around my ankles
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
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