So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
I drank so much Goldschläger last night, I could shit a necklace.
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
Tequila is the liquid version of celery. I lose more calories during tequila drunk and the following sexual activities than I gain by drinking it...
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
Bro, she said my penis was the best thing to happen to her mouth since teeth.
Tell him "come over but don't bring a flaccid dick"
Wear something tight
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
I promised her I would shit on your driveway. There's nothing that you or I can do about it now.
You like that 95% of the time I masterbate I think bout you?
Just wanna know what I can I do to earn the other 5%
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
Randomize
