i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
I'm in my boyfriends bathroom and I shit so bad, there was no toilet paper but his mom's clothes were on the floor and I wiped my butt on her underwear... now it looks like she sharted
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
she called me a fuckfaceshitdick. not that's creative. it sounds like a crayola crayon, preferrably an orange-brown shade.
We didn't talk. I watched you drop an egg on the floor. And watched you praise your haunted broom.
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
I was so high I just stared at the papa john's app on my phone and cried
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
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