An ex-gang member just asked me out on a date via note. And spelled dinner wrong. Win?
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
My ex came to my place while I was gone. Random things he took: snow shoes, my laundry quarters, a decorative picture, all my condiments, the container that held my rice and a sticker off my wallet. Then left a note saying he watered my plants and fed my cats. What. The. Fuck.
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
I'm hungover during 4th grade graduation practice. I AM THEIR FUTURE.
You can't just say you're dying of terminal cancer everytime they try to card you
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
never let me tell the bartender to cut me off, i basically told on myself
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
Randomize