fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
You kept saying,"there's a seahorse in my stomach, who's trying escape". This was after the curtains attacked you.
He just showed up at my house and was like "have you seen an axe laying around?" he wasnt wearing any shoes.
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
I deflowered you on valentines day. I AM THE BEST AT ROMANCE. LOVE ME.
He is more interested in finding his sweater than he is in having sex with me. It better be a great fucking sweater.
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
He kept saying "Ayyyyyyy" during foreplay... during sex.... during everything! It felt like I was having sex with friggin Fonzie from Happy Days!
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
Randomize
